The Shortest Word with the Biggest Impact
Perhaps it is not at all surprising that in numerology the simple word “NO” translates (5+6 = 11) into the number 11, a master number, and therefore a powerful word when correctly used. Although short in form, it obviously carries a huge clout, because it can be found in some 500 different languages and dialects worldwide, including:
- Apache: Dah
- U.S.A. Informal: Nope
- Zulu: Cha
- Thai: Maidai
- Swedish: Nej
and MANY others! Look here: CLICK HERE
Used correctly, it is the golden key to getting action, and the secret is knowing WHEN to use it. Often it can be a turning point in people's lives, so here are 5 simple tips to getting the right sort of action, and then results that matter:
1. Remember, the cardinal rule is, within reason, to avoid saying YES immediately to everything, because once you have done so, there is no going back. In fact, saying NO gives you breathing space to provide a constructive 'waiting period' for conditions or timing which is more opportune.
2. If you assess that the costs or risks in a situation may be too high, there is certainly no shame involved in saying NO, even though under pressure it may take some courage to do so.
3. The acid test to saying no, is when your level of integrity is liable to be placed under scrutiny, especially when you are faced with powerfully financially based 'incentives' to encourage dishonest behavior on your part.
4. You need to decide, in a business environment, if long lunches, invitations to seedy strip joints, or 'waste of time' meetings just consume your valuable time, produce little, nothing, or are even retrogressive. Top 10 Time wasters in life: CLICK HERE
5. Saying NO is a great leveler which allows you to determine your own priorities when every option in front of you seems equally attractive.
Bottom line? - 'No' can actually be a remarkably positive word, as well as an effective counter response to tantalizing alternatives.
When times get tough, if you are a parent, or employed in a position of authority, saying YES, or 'going with the flow' can often seem to be so much easier – mainly because it is infinitely less confrontational, and even distasteful. But 'being-in-charge' where there is a possibility of spending too much, running hare-brained schemes and risky projects always places one under an obligation to say NO. But in doing so, there is a right and a wrong way, which handled properly can minimize the accompanying disappointment, and possible rejection.
The Royal Road to the 'Diplomatic' NO
Courteous Consideration: As a rule, adopt a courteous and polite stance. Most people find it difficult to rant and rave at someone who is able to maintain a sense of decorum under pressure. In fact, they will most often respond by behaving in a reciprocal, equally courteous manner.
Open your ears, close your mouth
Make the effort to correctly use what your maker gave you, in the right order: two ears and ONE mouth – which means, listen first....twice! People have a right to be listened to, and their views heard, then considered. Blocking that option is simply asking for trouble at the outset. Animosity, and its spin-off is then a given. To learn more about listening first: CLICK HERE
Do not dilly-dally
Don't hang around unnecessarily before reaching a decision – preferably as quickly as is practically possible. Unneeded delays increase increase the notion that you are heading toward giving a YES answer. Even worse, the luke-warm responses like 'I am not yet sure' can, and in fact do, sound like a YES, heightening their hopes, and is more than likely to lead to resentment when you finally give the NO you should have in the first place anyway. The top 10 time wasters: CLICK HERE
Soften the blow, say NO, but then make sure to explain
If you say NO politely, based on your just consideration of the available facts, people will generally find it easier to accept. In the process of doing so though, if you take the trouble to explain why you have said no, clarifies the fact that you have considered the options.
Do not get into an argument under any circumstances.
People who hear the word NO, naturally feel a sense of disappointment and can retaliate by wanting to argue about the issues as they see them. One thing is certain: an argument on that premise can never be 'won'. A better option is to enter into a rational discussion, and in doing so, go out of your way to opening the door, simply by asking them to suggest possible alternatives. The REAL costs of just arguing have been well researched: CLICK HERE
Never come across as being apologetic
If you have made the right decision by saying NO, there can be no reason to be apologetic. A better stance is to be sympathetic, but then point out why a NO is a good idea this time around. What happens when we are apologetic? CLICK HERE
Build bridges and reach out
Having said NO does not mean that the episode is over on other people's eyes, as there may always be some lingering resentment. To be ahead in the game, you need to take the initiative – reach out to show you do care, and that it is not a death sentence to a relationship – in fact, it could be a new beginning, starting with a fresh perspective.