Does an Apology Mean I'm Sorry?

An apology does not mean someone is sorry. Have you ever taken the time to examine a person’s apology to you? Ask yourself was the apology giving because the person understood they were wrong?

Was the apology giving just to avoid an argument? Apologizing does not mean the person agrees with how you feel, it just means they feel bad for making you feel hurt. So it is important that the person giving the apology understands why you feel hurt. Not every apology is a meaningful one. There different reasons a person might apologize. Are they saying sorry because they made you feel bad or because they hurt your feelings?

Many people say “I’m Sorry” and don’t even know why they are sorry. They apologize to avoid feeling uncomfortable or to eliminate long lasting feelings of resentment from there partner, friend or otherwise. They usually don’t take the time to examine or address the reason you are upset or hurt. They will try to reason with you on how they feel you are wrong for being made or feeling as if you are owed an apology. The apology only accomplishes the acknowledgment of your hurt feeling, but does not fix the issue at hand.

Once you accept the apology, it’s saying the other person has accepted responsibility for upsetting you. This isn’t always the true, in many cases the person gives an apology just as a form of surrender. They would rather reconcile with you, then continue to feel the pressure that follows a disagreement between two people.

To disagree with someone you know, whether friend, relative or life partner. This is a normal activity in most people’s lives. Sometimes a disagreement between people can make the relationship stronger. An apology which is sincere and real will always make it better, stronger and last longer.

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Judith Barton
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Posted on May 12, 2010